| Finding a person with whom you would like to establish a committed relationship is hard, but making the relationship long-lasting may be much more difficult. No relationship is without conflict. The way in which we deal with these conflict situations will determine our personalities. Some couples will deal with harder challenges and this may either cause them to build up a tighter relationship or force them to terminate the relationship. Then there are the families that face large conflicts that occur because of kids getting older. No matter what, conflict is unavoidable and we all have to deal with it sooner or later. Learning to solve conflict situations and working on the relationship using various tactics is essential to save the relationship.
Evolutionary scientists examined "mate retention strategies" in American ladies and men and found these strategies include being overly watchful and threatening violence. Men's and ladies' tactics applied to keep their marriages intact differ.
To evaluate qualities valued in partners and how they keep their marriages intact, researchers of the University of Texas conducted a survey of 214 married people.
Men, more than women, admitted that they exploited their social status and financial success as a tactic to keep their mate interested in them, reported the psychologists. Men also reported to keep their wives interested by making promises of changes and making threats of sexual betrayal.
Women were also more likely than men to work on their physical look as a tactic to arouse interest.
With regard to infidelity, it was found out that if a husband suspected that his wife was having an affair, he would try and keep his wife from public activities, threaten punishment and criticize other men. Surprisingly, women who suspected their husbands of infidelity did not work on the marriage any harder than those without suspicions.
Unfortunately, some male strategies included behaviors that are identified as early indicators of the physical abuse of wives, said the authors. For example, in an earlier survey, 72 percent of women requiring medical attention admitted that their husbands limited their contact with family and friends, insisted on knowing the women's whereabouts and called ladies names. |
